Recently I met [my wife] Leesa and the kids for lunch. Seated catty-corner to us was a mother and her teenage boys. I couldn’t help but notice that one of the boys had a T-shirt emblazoned with “KORN” in big letters across the front. Later, the teens took off, leaving Mom (and her Visa) to cover the bill.
I went over to her and quietly said, “Do you mind if I ask you a question?” She didn’t.
“I was just wondering how you handle the fact that one of your sons wears a T-shirt of a band whose lead singer fantasizes about brutally torturing his stepmother.”
With a shocked expression, she gaped at me and replied, “I had no idea.”
I don’t know what became of mother and teen, but I imagine they had a heart-to-heart talk later that day. At least I hope they did.
When I got back to my table, I told my family what I’d done and why. Later, I asked my then 9-year-old son, Trevor, what he’d learned. His reply was priceless.
“It was bad music,” he said. “The teenager knew about the music, but the mom didn’t.” My daughter Kelsey agreed.
“What is bad music?” I asked.
“Music about killing people,” my daughter replied. (I’ve heard her on another occasion say “music with bad words.”)
Later in life, my children and I will talk about other problematic elements—sexual issues for one. But for now, “killing people” and “bad words” are things they understand.
I’m pleased they are developing discernment and making it personal. One thing’s for sure: There will be plenty of teachable moments in the days and years to come.
