|
Development Topics
Parenting the Strong-Willed Child
Wills are Born, Not Made
Willfulness is built into the nature of some kids. It is simply part of their
emotional and intellectual package brought with them into the world. This aspect
of inborn temperament is not something boys and girls learn. It is something
they are.
The “blank slate” hypothesis is a myth. Children don’t start
life at the same place. They bring with them an individuality that is uniquely
their own, different from that of every other individual who has ever lived.
One of their innate characteristics is what I have termed “the strength
of the will,” which varies from child to child.
What do we know specifically about children with particularly strong wills?
-
There are nearly three times as many strong-willed kids as those who are
compliant.
-
Birth order has nothing to do with being strong-willed or compliant.
-
Most parents know they have a strong-willed child very early.
-
The temperaments of children tend to reflect those of their parents.
-
Parents of strong-willed children can expect a battle during the teen
years, even if they have raised them properly.
The best news for parents of strong-willed children is the rapid decrease in
their rebellion in young adulthood. It drops almost immediately in the early
twenties and then trails off even more from there. Some are still angry into
their twenties and early thirties, but by then the fire is gone for the majority.
They peacefully rejoin the human community.
— Dr. James C. Dobson
Adapted from The
New Strong-Willed Child by Dr. James C. Dobson.
Copyright © 2004, Tyndale House Pubishers. All rights reserved. Used by permission.
Do you have thoughts, questions, advice on this topic? Post your stories and comments in the forum for other parents to respond to. Enter the forum now.
|
 |
|
