Challenges in the Teen Years

Dr. Dobson Answers Your Questions

Q. Our 14-year-old recently came to my husband and me to say, “I’m pregnant.” Nothing has ever upset us more than hearing those words. What should our attitude toward her be now?

A. Responding to a teenage pregnancy is one of the most difficult trials parents are ever asked to face. When the news breaks, it’s reasonable to feel anger at the girl who has brought this humiliation and pain into her life. How dare this kid do something so stupid and hurtful to herself and the entire family!

Once you have caught your breath, however, a more rational and loving response is appropriate. This is no time for recrimination. Your daughter needs your understanding and wisdom now more than ever. She’ll face many important decisions in the next few months, and you can’t afford to alienate yourselves from her. She will also need your spiritual guidance as you point her to the Lord for forgiveness and direction.

If you can summon a measure of strength and love at this stressful time, you should be able to create the bond that often develops between those who have survived a crisis together.

— Dr. James Dobson

This article was adapted from Complete Marriage and Family Home Reference Guide by Dr. James Dobson with the permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Copyright 2000 by James Dobson, Inc. All rights reserved. International copyright secured.

Last updated: May 2005

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On This Topic

• Introduction • Understanding Early Adolescents • Dating vs. Courtship • Perceived Laziness • Dealing with Sassiness • Masturbation • Teen Pregnancy • Drug Use • Disciplining a Teenager • Tough Love

Your daughter needs your understanding and wisdom now more than ever.