Spending time with your children is important. However, according to child therapist J. Kussin, spending “special time” with your child is an indispensable means of increasing positive behaviors and improving your relationship with your child. Follow these five steps to structure special time with your child:
1. Plan the time in advance. Your child needs to know that she is as special as your hair appointment and your dinner out with friends.
2. Allow your child to choose the activity. You can guide your child to choose an interactive activity like playing, cooking, crafting or reading. If she chooses TV, make sure you talk about what you watched afterward.
3. Spend at least 20 to 30 minutes together. Special time doesn’t have to be long; it just has to be “special.” A set amount of time should be allotted to make sure that this time is separate from other items on the family agenda.
4. Schedule special time weekly. It gives your child something to look forward to.
5. Include only one child and one parent at a time. Each child should have individual time to bond with each parent.
Footnote:
Kussin, J.R. (1996). Catch them being good: A guide to positive parenting. CA: Verdugo Mental Health Center.
